darthxpanda asked: Nononono. If I lose you and your videos... I hope you lose the Kardashians! Or were your tags a joke? Either way, my poor little black heart hurts :(
To be completely honest, I cannot see myself making YouTube videos (on my personal channel) for another year, for a variety of reasons I assume I’ll talk about when the time comes. Or maybe I’ll just leave and never talk about it because most aspects have already been talked to death by various people (including myself) over the past several years. And I also think I’ve learned that talking about it doesn’t really help change anything. I always sort of thought I’d finally be ready to go when I’d come to terms with things and no longer felt the need to explain them.
It’s just a mix of companies trying to take a piece of out everything I do, ulterior motives, bad comments, bad people, bad vibes. Everyone I really care about left years ago, and I sort of admire them for that. It can really rip out your soul and make you feel like shit. YouTube is TV now anyway. All vlogs are just part of the same formula, and the viewers don’t decide on what’s good or not anymore. And the people who think any sort of communal aspects still exist are delusional beyond belief.
And then just some bad things have happened in my personal life over the past year that I’m not ready to talk about either. And it’s weird that there are people (and this isn’t directed at the lovely person who sent the question) who expect me to explain my personal life just because I happen to put myself out there in other ways. It’s all just very dehumanizing the way everyone treats each other on the Internet, and very damaging psychologically and physically.
It’s no secret my views are dwindling, and for the first time in years I’ve been in the red with my subscriber count a few times. I’m tired of my self-worth being connected to those things, and I’m tired of it making me feel bad, and of all the skeezy things I feel like I have to do to stay interesting or relevant.
I’m also not haughty enough to believe I’m some important figure and that it really matters if I’m there or not. I wasn’t generation 1, and I wasn’t generation 2+. I was some sort of weird generation 1.5 YouTuber, sandwiched between what the site used to be and what the site has now become. I will go someday and the site will continue and people will go on with their lives.
Meh, now is not the time to go into it anyway. I’m not quite ready to quit. As of now, my heart is still in my videos (and the videos I make for other projects) and I still have things I want to create, so I’ll keep making vids until that desire is gone. I just assume it will be in the next year or so, but who knows?
Anyway, none of those things were directed at the person who sent me this. Just rambling on.
This is a super duper bummer…I hope I am not delusional in my belief that communities still exist and are strong on YouTube, but Joseph is certainly right that it has changed.
But it remains up to us to continue doing cool things with the platforms we have access to. To require the people we watch to think about things besides how many views things get and to require the people who watch to not just stare vacantly at a screen.
Money and success and (yes) even fame can distort that, but not if we are dedicated to the idea that this thing doesn’t exist to make numbers go up, it exists to make interesting things happen. A lot of people I know remain dedicated to that.
So weird that I was just talking about this with John on Twitter.
I’m with Hank in that I, too, hope I’m not delusional for believing that the community is still thriving. I completely understand where Joe and John (and many other people!) are coming from, but on the other hand, I think we need to adapt. It’s true that certain aspects of the platform have changed, but I don’t think it’s wrong or futile or blissfully ignorant of us to try to work around the things we don’t like.
The community is still there, and it’s bigger than ever. The difference is that back when YouTube started, it seemed to be a more homogeneous group. Now, with the exponential increase in types of content and creators, the community has (and had to) spread out.
I started in late 2008, so I think I came late to the game and might be in that 1.5 gen that Joe referred to. I also enjoy that this makes us sound like Pokemon.
Anyway, before I ramble on too long, the TL;DR is that I don’t think anyone should be discouraged by unfavorable change. Especially amazing people like Joe and John. The community “feel” may have changed, but I still believe it’s there.
I’m also annoyingly persistent and refuse to give things up, so there’s that.
1- First Youtuber you ever watched
2- Favorite Youtuber at the moment
3- Favorite collaboration (if any)
4- Favorite Video
5- Top 5 YoutubersBesides my friends obv:
6- Favorite Ship (if any)
7- Last Youtuber you watched
8- How many Youtubers are you subscribed to?
9- Where are most of the Youtubers you watch from?
10- How often do you watch Youtubers?
2-3 hours a day? Maybe more depending on how antisocial I am
11- Have you ever planned on becoming a Youtuber?
12- Favorite Male Youtuber
13- Favorite Female Youtuber
14- Youngest Youtuber you watch
15- How did you discover your favorite Youtuber?
I have no clue. Probably just poking around and clicking on stuff!